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Wheatgerm's 10 observations from his trip to Canada
said...
1. Windsor has a lot of bars. And strip joints. And Cuban cigar stores. And gambling. (Sez Marc: “You had me at bars.”) Kinda what you see outside some military bases. Tattoo parlors, pawn shops. A pretty northern shoreline, but little else to offer. Not exactly a tourist destination. “Windsor: You don’t need to visit.”
2. The smog capital of Canada. 18-wheelers hauling freight non-stop to and from Detroit. It’s impressive. They have a dedicated lane of traffic to the border over the Ambassador Bridge.
3. From the movies playing on TV and the music playing everywhere, I got the distinct impression that Windsor was just now receiving US culture from 20-30 years ago. As you might expect in parts of Morocco.
4. Only one moose sighting the entire trip. He was in Toronto. In the airport. Stuffed. No snow on the ground, no permafrost, no ptarmigan, no baby seals, no Canadian Mounties. So this is the Great White North, eh?
5. French is everywhere, even in this Detroit suburb. I thought I could get by with my knowledge of pop lyrics. Michelle, ma belle, sont des mots qui vent trés bien ensemble. Ils ont changé ma chanson, Ma. Voulez vous coucher avec moi, ce soir? Tried to order a native dish of French fries (see No. 10 below) and ended up with a prostitute. But turns out everyone knows English and is as nice as can be. So I didn’t embarrass myself much.
6. The Windsor Lancers have the worst PA system in North America. No one understood what the announcer was saying. No one. But I thought I once heard him say, “Time oot on the floor.”
7. The UK fans who make these trips are predominantly silver foxes. Never saw so many senior citizens wearing UK paraphernalia. I guess it’s what you do when you retire. Take a tour bus travel package to see the Cats. And share your family’s medical problems all too loudly at the free breakfast buffet.
8. If you’re not wearing UK gear, the UK people don’t talk to you. You’re not visibly a member of the club. I didn’t wear UK gear, and I might as well have been an alien. It was most striking in the elevator. At one game, the lady sitting next to me looked me up and down and said, “Are you for the Lancers?” I should have played along.
9. Calipari embarrassed the program by wearing his ‘jammies to the first two games. Looked like he just rolled out of bed. Now we know what his mug shot looks like. Jesus, dude. Represent.
10. Poutine. Sounds dirty, and it is. French fries topped with fresh cheese curd and covered with brown gravy. It must be popular because it’s everywhere. If you don't want to take a chance, order the “Royale with cheese.”
2 comments:
1. Windsor has a lot of bars. And strip joints. And Cuban cigar stores. And gambling. (Sez Marc: “You had me at bars.”) Kinda what you see outside some military bases. Tattoo parlors, pawn shops. A pretty northern shoreline, but little else to offer. Not exactly a tourist destination. “Windsor: You don’t need to visit.”
2. The smog capital of Canada. 18-wheelers hauling freight non-stop to and from Detroit. It’s impressive. They have a dedicated lane of traffic to the border over the Ambassador Bridge.
3. From the movies playing on TV and the music playing everywhere, I got the distinct impression that Windsor was just now receiving US culture from 20-30 years ago. As you might expect in parts of Morocco.
4. Only one moose sighting the entire trip. He was in Toronto. In the airport. Stuffed. No snow on the ground, no permafrost, no ptarmigan, no baby seals, no Canadian Mounties. So this is the Great White North, eh?
5. French is everywhere, even in this Detroit suburb. I thought I could get by with my knowledge of pop lyrics. Michelle, ma belle, sont des mots qui vent trés bien ensemble. Ils ont changé ma chanson, Ma. Voulez vous coucher avec moi, ce soir? Tried to order a native dish of French fries (see No. 10 below) and ended up with a prostitute. But turns out everyone knows English and is as nice as can be. So I didn’t embarrass myself much.
6. The Windsor Lancers have the worst PA system in North America. No one understood what the announcer was saying. No one. But I thought I once heard him say, “Time oot on the floor.”
7. The UK fans who make these trips are predominantly silver foxes. Never saw so many senior citizens wearing UK paraphernalia. I guess it’s what you do when you retire. Take a tour bus travel package to see the Cats. And share your family’s medical problems all too loudly at the free breakfast buffet.
8. If you’re not wearing UK gear, the UK people don’t talk to you. You’re not visibly a member of the club. I didn’t wear UK gear, and I might as well have been an alien. It was most striking in the elevator. At one game, the lady sitting next to me looked me up and down and said, “Are you for the Lancers?” I should have played along.
9. Calipari embarrassed the program by wearing his ‘jammies to the first two games. Looked like he just rolled out of bed. Now we know what his mug shot looks like. Jesus, dude. Represent.
10. Poutine. Sounds dirty, and it is. French fries topped with fresh cheese curd and covered with brown gravy. It must be popular because it’s everywhere. If you don't want to take a chance, order the “Royale with cheese.”
Nice WG!
You act as if #1 is a bad thing! LOL...
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